And...here we are again.
THUMBS UP: That history paper from the last blog entry? Got a B on it!
THUMBS DOWN: It only took me until 2 am the day it was due because my printer decided to start omitting random letters from every page, and my prof probably wouldn't have been too pleased to hear about "King eorge." (That's "King George" for those of you who don't speak demented-printer-ese.)
THUMBS UP: The printer problem has since been taken care of...
THUMBS DOWN: ...but part of solving the problem involved canceling three weeks' worth of papers in queue. Oh, well.
THUMBS UP: Finals are over (and have been since Tuesday)!
THUMBS DOWN: I'm still not home yet...
THUMBS UP: ...because I'm in Boston on tour with the Subs.
THUMBS DOWN: A crazy ice storm hit New England, leaving people - including my family and much of my town - without electricity, running water, phone service, and heat.
THUMBS UP: I'm in a well-heated, well-lit Hampton Inn.
THUMBS DOWN: My friends' fish that I were taking care of over break? They weren't quite so lucky.
THUMBS SUPER-DOWN: Lots of dead fish.
THUMBS WAY, WAY DOWN: I have to break the news to said friends.
THUMBS UP: My friends are very understanding people. This is partly why I love them.
THUMBS DOWN: Remembering why I love them reminds me of how much I miss them.
THUMBS UP: I'll see them again...!
THUMBS DOWN: ...but not for two weeks, six days, and a few hours.
THUMBS UP: I get to see my friends back home...!
THUMBS DOWN: But not until they get out on break in like a week. Or five days. Whatever. It's a long time, okay?
THUMBS UP: Michelle, the peanut butter to my jelly, has a blog! As does Kelly!
THUMBS DOWN: Said blogs are not updated nearly enough to suit my creeper tendencies. =) (Get on that, would you, guys? Just kidding...ish.)
THUMBS UP: I finally got wireless access here on the fourth floor of the Hampton Inn...
THUMBS DOWN: ...but I have to sit on the ground next to the bathroom door facing the wall in order to get any signal at all.
THUMBS UP: There's a mirror on the wall, though, so I can indulge in narcissistic admiration of my own reflection.
THUMBS DOWN: This doesn't change the fact that sitting on the floor makes my butt hurt.
THUMBS UP: Going home tomorrow!
THUMBS DOWN: House is without heat, running water, power, phone, and any other amenities, making it feel more like an Navy SEAL exercise in torture endurance than home.
THUMBS UP: At least I'm not a fish?
Monday, December 15, 2008
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down
Today sees the introduction of a new feature to this blog (possibly the only feature on this blog) entitled Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down. It's pretty self-explanatory.
THUMBS UP: I finished my Jewish studies paper and my proposal for the final paper.
THUMBS DOWN: I have a history paper due Monday at 10 am. I haven't really started it...ish.
THUMBS UP: But Monday at 10:01 will be the most glorious moment of my life, after which I only have my final Jewish studies paper as far as intense assignments go. And that'll be much easier than my history paper.
THUMBS DOWN: There are approximately 3 days, 17 hours and 51 minutes between me and the sweet glory of 10:01 on Monday.
THUMBS UP: Some people's bodies respond to stress by losing weight.
THUMBS DOWN: My body's response to stress is, "OMG!!! Eat your feelings!!! Look! An OATMEAL CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE!!!"
THUMBS UP: It was a really good cookie. Mrs. Fields...mmmm.
THUMBS DOWN: The sheer amount of work I have to do precludes my going to the gym to possibly feel less guilty about eating said cookie. Plus, there that whole "lacking endorphins when I most need them" thing.
THUMBS UP: My prof gave me a lot of good tips on paper-writing when I went to his office hours today.
THUMBS DOWN: It was totally intimidating hearing about all this stuff I didn't know to begin with.
THUMBS UP: Amrita did a project on the same topic in high school and she has offered to be my sounding board/editor of sorts.
THUMBS DOWN: WHY AM I SUCH A PROCRASTINATOR?!
To sum up: kiddies, no matter how quickly you usually work and how much you usually procrastinate, DON'T anymore. Or, if you must procrastinate, comment and let me know that you have been similarly screwed over by a class assignment (read: yourself).
THUMBS UP: I finished my Jewish studies paper and my proposal for the final paper.
THUMBS DOWN: I have a history paper due Monday at 10 am. I haven't really started it...ish.
THUMBS UP: But Monday at 10:01 will be the most glorious moment of my life, after which I only have my final Jewish studies paper as far as intense assignments go. And that'll be much easier than my history paper.
THUMBS DOWN: There are approximately 3 days, 17 hours and 51 minutes between me and the sweet glory of 10:01 on Monday.
THUMBS UP: Some people's bodies respond to stress by losing weight.
THUMBS DOWN: My body's response to stress is, "OMG!!! Eat your feelings!!! Look! An OATMEAL CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE!!!"
THUMBS UP: It was a really good cookie. Mrs. Fields...mmmm.
THUMBS DOWN: The sheer amount of work I have to do precludes my going to the gym to possibly feel less guilty about eating said cookie. Plus, there that whole "lacking endorphins when I most need them" thing.
THUMBS UP: My prof gave me a lot of good tips on paper-writing when I went to his office hours today.
THUMBS DOWN: It was totally intimidating hearing about all this stuff I didn't know to begin with.
THUMBS UP: Amrita did a project on the same topic in high school and she has offered to be my sounding board/editor of sorts.
THUMBS DOWN: WHY AM I SUCH A PROCRASTINATOR?!
To sum up: kiddies, no matter how quickly you usually work and how much you usually procrastinate, DON'T anymore. Or, if you must procrastinate, comment and let me know that you have been similarly screwed over by a class assignment (read: yourself).
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Stereotypical Political/Election Post
I was going to update all evening, seeing as this is a historic (or, as some people insist on saying, AN historic) event and all, but then I got caught up in eating cotton candy and drinking generic cola in the common area downstairs while watching Indecision 2008. When the results came in on CNN, everyone jumped up and started screaming and hugging. It felt like New Years, but with some actual cultural significance. Here's hoping Barack Obama is better at keeping resolutions than I am.
So, in the spirit of excitement, Michi and David and I decided to walk to the Green, expecting that there would be some sort of gathering there. Wrong. We did, however, have fun lying in the (empty) street and taking pictures of us imitating the pedestrian symbol painted on the ground near the crosswalk. We then proceeded to walk around campus and return home in time to watch Obama's speech on Dee's laptop (yay for streaming television!). Apparently there are people on the Green now. I can here them screaming from all the way across campus. Jeez, you miss out on so much when you're ahead of your time like the three of us were. I seriously don't know what I'm going to do without Michi and David when they go to the Latino conference this weekend. I mean, we've already christened me an honorary Mexican. I should be an honorary candidate, too.
They're letting off fireworks now? Seriously? I mean, I know we're in New Hampshire and it's therefore legal (unlike in my lovely home state of Massachusetts, where people just drive fifteen minutes over the border to legally buy fireworks and then proceed to illegally set them off - loudly - in Massachusetts at inconvenient times, such as when one is trying to sleep or have a phone conversation), but come on! I feel so left out!
I have to be up at 7:00 tomorrow morning for 7:45 drill, and I still have some reading to do, so I'd better get going. But one more exciting (?) thing before I go - my blog has ONE follower.
Thanks, Mom, but I don't need your pity. That's why I moved out.
Just kidding. I don't know who this person is because I haven't bothered to check yet, but thank you. You are my light, my self-esteem-booster, my--
Oh shoot, I left my laundry in the laundry room. I haven't switched to the dryer yet. Now I have to leave it there overnight.
Fiddlesticks.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Some Political Commentary for You, Sir or Madam?
In celebration of the fact that I registered to vote yesterday (and got two stickers saying so which I proudly wore around campus), I'm going to share some in-depth political commentary from Jess and me (mostly Jess, because she actually watched the debate, whereas I'm still trying to figure out my cable hookup).
Jess is green, I'm tan.
McCain's catchphrase is "my friends"
look, my friends
see, my friends
it goes like this, my friends
...
i can't keep up with these two, they just bounce around
"by the way, my friends"
oh, john mccain
...
"we've got to drill offshore my friends"
they are basically ignoring the questions and attacking the other and defending against the other, lol
well, that's politics for you
...
obama just talks and talks and talks
he has one minute
and then like
he just goes
and goes
and goes
and goes
does he now?
he does
xD
when is this supposed to end?
no idea
tomorrow at 4am at this rate
Jess is green, I'm tan.
McCain's catchphrase is "my friends"
look, my friends
see, my friends
it goes like this, my friends
...
i can't keep up with these two, they just bounce around
"by the way, my friends"
oh, john mccain
...
"we've got to drill offshore my friends"
they are basically ignoring the questions and attacking the other and defending against the other, lol
well, that's politics for you
...
obama just talks and talks and talks
he has one minute
and then like
he just goes
and goes
and goes
and goes
does he now?
he does
xD
when is this supposed to end?
no idea
tomorrow at 4am at this rate
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Odes to College Life (So Far)
I'm feeling poetic today, so I figured I'd go back to my true literary calling: haikus. I did them once before (about working at the MB) with great success (honk honk*), so why not do some more?
(*the sound of me tooting my own horn)
Of course, I haven't worked at the Basket in, oh, four weeks on account of the fact that I now live two hours away from it, so I needed to find a new topic, and that new topic is college living. So, without further ado...
Ode to the Drunk People Outside
I know you like beer
I know you like to party
But I want to sleep
Ode to My MacBook
It took me awhile
To learn how to copy/paste
But it's all good now.
Ode to the Weather
When I don't have class
Sun shines. When I do have class
I walk in the rain.
Ode to Drill
Seven-forty five:
"Parlez français avec nous!"
Shoot me, s'il vous plait.
Ode to My Mini-Fridge
You make weird noises
But you hold all my junk food
So I love you lots.
Second Ode to My MacBook
I procrastinate
But now with my new MacBook,
I do it way more.
Ode to Febreeze Extra-Strength Spray
Without you, Febreeze,
My dorm room would still smell like
Dust and sweaty feet.
Ode to My Parents
I love you so much!
Life's not the same without you!
Please send more money!
(*the sound of me tooting my own horn)
Of course, I haven't worked at the Basket in, oh, four weeks on account of the fact that I now live two hours away from it, so I needed to find a new topic, and that new topic is college living. So, without further ado...
Ode to the Drunk People Outside
I know you like beer
I know you like to party
But I want to sleep
Ode to My MacBook
It took me awhile
To learn how to copy/paste
But it's all good now.
Ode to the Weather
When I don't have class
Sun shines. When I do have class
I walk in the rain.
Ode to Drill
Seven-forty five:
"Parlez français avec nous!"
Shoot me, s'il vous plait.
Ode to My Mini-Fridge
You make weird noises
But you hold all my junk food
So I love you lots.
Second Ode to My MacBook
I procrastinate
But now with my new MacBook,
I do it way more.
Ode to Febreeze Extra-Strength Spray
Without you, Febreeze,
My dorm room would still smell like
Dust and sweaty feet.
Ode to My Parents
I love you so much!
Life's not the same without you!
Please send more money!
Thursday, September 18, 2008
The Joys of College Living
1. My college ID picture is far more flattering than my drivers' license picture.
2. Free food everywhere. EVERYWHERE.
3. Free stuff, too - key chains, magnets, pens, clips, mini flashlights, drinking cups, bags, tee shirts, condoms...you name it, someone is giving it away.
4. With the miracle of mini-fridges, one never has to make the grueling walk from bedroom to kitchen in the middle of watching TV.
5. New MacBook!!! (Fun fact: My MacBook's spellchecker keeps telling me I'm spelling "MacBook" incorrectly, which is funny because I just copy it directly off the logo under the screen that says "MacBook.")
6. Skype! (Although this is also a downside, because if all my friends and family were still around there would be no need for Skype.)
7. Always something to do. I usually opt to go chill in my room, but should I ever feel the need to play pong at 1:30 in the morning, I could.
8. I can drink orange juice straight out of the carton (and not just when it's almost gone...today I opened a brand-new orange juice - Tropicana, the only good kind - and unapologetically drank it straight from the carton. Sorry, Mom.)
9. Added perks for me: giant room to myself in a quad with a common room and full bath. My suitemates are all wicked nice, too.
Now, if only I could figure out what to do about those pesky classes...
2. Free food everywhere. EVERYWHERE.
3. Free stuff, too - key chains, magnets, pens, clips, mini flashlights, drinking cups, bags, tee shirts, condoms...you name it, someone is giving it away.
4. With the miracle of mini-fridges, one never has to make the grueling walk from bedroom to kitchen in the middle of watching TV.
5. New MacBook!!! (Fun fact: My MacBook's spellchecker keeps telling me I'm spelling "MacBook" incorrectly, which is funny because I just copy it directly off the logo under the screen that says "MacBook.")
6. Skype! (Although this is also a downside, because if all my friends and family were still around there would be no need for Skype.)
7. Always something to do. I usually opt to go chill in my room, but should I ever feel the need to play pong at 1:30 in the morning, I could.
8. I can drink orange juice straight out of the carton (and not just when it's almost gone...today I opened a brand-new orange juice - Tropicana, the only good kind - and unapologetically drank it straight from the carton. Sorry, Mom.)
9. Added perks for me: giant room to myself in a quad with a common room and full bath. My suitemates are all wicked nice, too.
Now, if only I could figure out what to do about those pesky classes...
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Quick Post
A quick round-up of the events of this past week:
- Went hiking on pre-college freshmen trip. We backpacked over 22 miles of the Appalachian Trail in New Hampshire. It was moderately intense, which is still more intense than I was prepared to deal with. Luckily, we managed to miss most of the bad weather from Hurricane Hanna, because we got to sleep in CABINS!!!
- Second episode of Bones was leagues better than the season premiere. Still not quite up to snuff, though. And seriously, people online need to go easy on Sweets. He is becoming one of my favorite characters.
- The one week I miss Psych (last Friday, see above, re: backpacking) is the one week USA doesn't post the episode online. And it was also a good one, apparently.
- Tonight's episode of Psych was also good. I'm bummed that it won't be back until January, though.
- I am done with working at the Basket...until Thanksgiving/Christmas, anyway. I still need to go pick up my paycheck, though, so I can buy a sicknasty pair of Chucks. Or, you know, use it to pay off some school-related expenses. One is fun; one is responsible. I cannot decide which to go with.
- Facebook's new layout sucks. Just saying.
Now I'm off to clean up my disaster area of a room, maybe do some packing, and catch the 12:30 re-run of the Soup. Later, dudes.
- Went hiking on pre-college freshmen trip. We backpacked over 22 miles of the Appalachian Trail in New Hampshire. It was moderately intense, which is still more intense than I was prepared to deal with. Luckily, we managed to miss most of the bad weather from Hurricane Hanna, because we got to sleep in CABINS!!!
- Met Daneille, one of my suitemates. She and her mom came over for dinner, which was nice. I think this year will be a good one, living-situation-wise.
- Second episode of Bones was leagues better than the season premiere. Still not quite up to snuff, though. And seriously, people online need to go easy on Sweets. He is becoming one of my favorite characters.
- The one week I miss Psych (last Friday, see above, re: backpacking) is the one week USA doesn't post the episode online. And it was also a good one, apparently.
- Tonight's episode of Psych was also good. I'm bummed that it won't be back until January, though.
- I am done with working at the Basket...until Thanksgiving/Christmas, anyway. I still need to go pick up my paycheck, though, so I can buy a sicknasty pair of Chucks. Or, you know, use it to pay off some school-related expenses. One is fun; one is responsible. I cannot decide which to go with.
- Facebook's new layout sucks. Just saying.
Now I'm off to clean up my disaster area of a room, maybe do some packing, and catch the 12:30 re-run of the Soup. Later, dudes.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Spoiler Alert!
I am about to commit television blasphemy: I was not happy with the season premiere of Bones.
I waited for it all summer (after a season finale whose plot mainly consisted of "Booth - Zach - Gormagon - WTF?!") and I had high expectations for the season premiere - even though, statistically, most of the shows I watch tend to be weakest in their fourth seasons -Buffy, Gilmore Girls (until the seventh season, which was far worse), and so on. Nevertheless, I thought Bones might be able to somehow sidestep the mud puddle that is a show's fourth season.
If the season premiere is any indication, then the answer is: not so much.
I was excited about the on-location filming in England, but it ended up feeling gimmicky. The Angela-Hodgins breakup (I told you right in the title of this entry, spoiler alert! Don't whine because you didn't pay attention to the warning!) was waaaayyyy too rushed. They're like, "I love you." "No, I love you." "Awww, kisses!!!!" "Wait, you don't trust me." "Well, I don't trust you either." "Let's break up." "I don't want to..." "Me neither. "...but okay." Seriously? SERIOUSLY?! They've gone through two seasons of relationship hurdles and all of a sudden they break up in a diner? In thirty seconds?! Come on, now. If you're having second thoughts about getting married, then DON'T GET MARRIED YET. You don't just break up with your longtime partner over one problem. Go to therapy, for crying out loud. Dr. Sweets - remember him - is a shrink with two doctorates. GET SOME FREE THERAPY FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Everything felt rather off. No one seemed upset about Zach anymore, which I found really weird. I mean, the guy went to Iraq for a couple months and no one could stop talking about it until he returned. The guy kills another human being, betrays the team, is tried for murder, and is sentenced to rot away in a mental institution for the rest of his life, and no one seems to care (apart from Brennan's brief mention of it at the beginning, which I totally didn't buy, by the way...talk about airing the dirty laundry in front of company. It felt like what it was: a quick recap for the audience about the events of last season. Seriously, splurge for a "Previously on Bones" montage. Don't bother with this contrived "let's just put the recap right into the script!" crap.)
Also, the first hour ended abruptly...or did it even end? We never found out who really committed the crime (was it the butler in the sitting room with the fireplace poker?). Not only that, but we never saw anyone all that invested in solving it. It's been established that Booth hates "privileged people" getting away with things. Wouldn't he be out there trying to prove the duke's guilt if he had even the slightest suspicion of his (the duke's) guilt?
And also, the lord was doing his sister? Gross. And yet, no one seemed all that upset about it - even the lord (and his girlfriend's) father, the duke. Are we supposed to believe that the British are just okay with incest for the most part ("Cheerio, this tea is rather cold, and that bloke shags his sister. Two distasteful things in one day. Oh, well.")?
Onto things I didn't hate quite so much: I could buy Cam sleeping with Grayson, and I could buy her feeling guilty about it. I didn't quite like the way things actually unfolded, but I can't put my finger on what it was I didn't like.
There were a few highlights of the episode, though. I liked Pritch (I'd seen the actress in something else - Bride and Prejudice, and it was nice to see her playing someone who wasn't a biznatch), and I wouldn't mind seeing more of her, although not as a love interest for Booth (not just because I love Booth/Brennan, but because I didn't think that he and Pritch had much romantic chemistry. Ian and Brennan had more, and I hated the thought of them together. I didn't like Ian all that much.). I thought the bells ringing when Hodgins and Angela kissed was cute and a nice touch. And pretty much everything with Sweets was good. (I'm one of the few who actually like him, I guess.) I was sad to see Clark - the new addition to the team - go, although I fully understand his reasons. There is far too much drama at the Jeffersonian. It's only a wonder that a smart man like him didn't figure it out way earlier - like last season, when he was there for Max's murder trial. He didn't pick up on the drama then?
All in all, though, it was a lackluster season premiere that hopefully is not an indication of the rest of the season's strength. I think that if the show doesn't get better, I'll have to place it's "jump the shark" moment at last season when they shot Booth. Everything went downhill after that.
But I'll be watching again next week. Hopefully I won't be disappointed again.
I waited for it all summer (after a season finale whose plot mainly consisted of "Booth - Zach - Gormagon - WTF?!") and I had high expectations for the season premiere - even though, statistically, most of the shows I watch tend to be weakest in their fourth seasons -Buffy, Gilmore Girls (until the seventh season, which was far worse), and so on. Nevertheless, I thought Bones might be able to somehow sidestep the mud puddle that is a show's fourth season.
If the season premiere is any indication, then the answer is: not so much.
I was excited about the on-location filming in England, but it ended up feeling gimmicky. The Angela-Hodgins breakup (I told you right in the title of this entry, spoiler alert! Don't whine because you didn't pay attention to the warning!) was waaaayyyy too rushed. They're like, "I love you." "No, I love you." "Awww, kisses!!!!" "Wait, you don't trust me." "Well, I don't trust you either." "Let's break up." "I don't want to..." "Me neither. "...but okay." Seriously? SERIOUSLY?! They've gone through two seasons of relationship hurdles and all of a sudden they break up in a diner? In thirty seconds?! Come on, now. If you're having second thoughts about getting married, then DON'T GET MARRIED YET. You don't just break up with your longtime partner over one problem. Go to therapy, for crying out loud. Dr. Sweets - remember him - is a shrink with two doctorates. GET SOME FREE THERAPY FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Everything felt rather off. No one seemed upset about Zach anymore, which I found really weird. I mean, the guy went to Iraq for a couple months and no one could stop talking about it until he returned. The guy kills another human being, betrays the team, is tried for murder, and is sentenced to rot away in a mental institution for the rest of his life, and no one seems to care (apart from Brennan's brief mention of it at the beginning, which I totally didn't buy, by the way...talk about airing the dirty laundry in front of company. It felt like what it was: a quick recap for the audience about the events of last season. Seriously, splurge for a "Previously on Bones" montage. Don't bother with this contrived "let's just put the recap right into the script!" crap.)
Also, the first hour ended abruptly...or did it even end? We never found out who really committed the crime (was it the butler in the sitting room with the fireplace poker?). Not only that, but we never saw anyone all that invested in solving it. It's been established that Booth hates "privileged people" getting away with things. Wouldn't he be out there trying to prove the duke's guilt if he had even the slightest suspicion of his (the duke's) guilt?
And also, the lord was doing his sister? Gross. And yet, no one seemed all that upset about it - even the lord (and his girlfriend's) father, the duke. Are we supposed to believe that the British are just okay with incest for the most part ("Cheerio, this tea is rather cold, and that bloke shags his sister. Two distasteful things in one day. Oh, well.")?
Onto things I didn't hate quite so much: I could buy Cam sleeping with Grayson, and I could buy her feeling guilty about it. I didn't quite like the way things actually unfolded, but I can't put my finger on what it was I didn't like.
There were a few highlights of the episode, though. I liked Pritch (I'd seen the actress in something else - Bride and Prejudice, and it was nice to see her playing someone who wasn't a biznatch), and I wouldn't mind seeing more of her, although not as a love interest for Booth (not just because I love Booth/Brennan, but because I didn't think that he and Pritch had much romantic chemistry. Ian and Brennan had more, and I hated the thought of them together. I didn't like Ian all that much.). I thought the bells ringing when Hodgins and Angela kissed was cute and a nice touch. And pretty much everything with Sweets was good. (I'm one of the few who actually like him, I guess.) I was sad to see Clark - the new addition to the team - go, although I fully understand his reasons. There is far too much drama at the Jeffersonian. It's only a wonder that a smart man like him didn't figure it out way earlier - like last season, when he was there for Max's murder trial. He didn't pick up on the drama then?
All in all, though, it was a lackluster season premiere that hopefully is not an indication of the rest of the season's strength. I think that if the show doesn't get better, I'll have to place it's "jump the shark" moment at last season when they shot Booth. Everything went downhill after that.
But I'll be watching again next week. Hopefully I won't be disappointed again.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Stranger Things Have Happened...No, Wait, They Really Haven't
I wanted to write but nothing too noteworthy happened today, so I will instead make a list of bizarre (but absolutely, 100% true) things that have happened at the Basket.
1. A man walks into a Market Basket supermarket...
...wearing a business suit and wool socks. No shoes. Just socks. It had rained recently. There were puddles. I'm just saying.
2. What's the big deal, anyway?
I give a woman her change. This is our post-sale interaction, verbatim.
WOMAN: Oooooh.
ME: What?
WOMAN: You gave me a Canadian quarter.
ME: ...
WOMAN: ...
ME: Do...you want me to...change it?
WOMAN: Yes. That'd be great.
So I have to go to the signout menu, hit the "no sale" button, and type in my password just because this lady has a thing against quarters with moose on them. Let me tell you something, lady: no one else in the world cares whether your quarter is Canadian or not. It came out of my roll of quarters. It's fine.
3. Didn't I used to have another kid?
A woman just strolled out of the store without her son once. The poor kid stood in the front of the store screaming "Mommy!" I might be mistaken, but I think someone had to go chase after her to get her to come back. For HER OWN CHILD.
4. Gee, what's that sound?
Another one in the category of negligent parents: A woman just stands by as her son flips the handle on the emergency exit door, which results in a loud, piercing, and - most importantly - annoying sound. Said woman calmly collects her children and strolls out without so much as an apology to the employees trying to figure out how to shut the alarm off or a reprimand to her precious child.
I amended my customer "hello-how-are-you" speech from "have a nice day" to "have a quiet day."
5. Scoot off a cliff, why dontcha?
Third in the Parental Negligence Series: a kid (around ten, maybe) will sometimes come into the store around 8 at night and ride his scooter along the front of the store (inside, not out) for no apparent reason, despite the fact that he's been kicked out multiple times for doing so.
6. Could I change four ridiculous hissy fits for one full-fledged tantrum?
A man asked me to make change in fives for his twenty. I politely told him that I can't make change (it's against store policy/rules) and that he could get change at the courtesy booth. He promptly exploded all over me.
ME: I'm sorry, sir, I can't make change.
MAN: What?! Don't give me that! I can see in your drawer; you've got a ton of fives right there!
ME: I'm not allowed to make change, sir. You can go over to the courtesy booth...
MAN: I don't WANT to go to the courtesy booth!
Well, I don't want to be having this conversation. Life just sucks for us both, I guess.
ME: I'm very sorry, sir.
MAN: They make change for me all the time at the [insert name of other town here] store!
Does this look like the [other town] store?! No. I don't care about what they do at the other store; I care about what my bosses tell me to do HERE. And they told me not to make change. I value my paycheck more than your constant need to have things your way.
ME: I'm sorry.
But not really.
I thought I had more stories than this. Poo.
1. A man walks into a Market Basket supermarket...
...wearing a business suit and wool socks. No shoes. Just socks. It had rained recently. There were puddles. I'm just saying.
2. What's the big deal, anyway?
I give a woman her change. This is our post-sale interaction, verbatim.
WOMAN: Oooooh.
ME: What?
WOMAN: You gave me a Canadian quarter.
ME: ...
WOMAN: ...
ME: Do...you want me to...change it?
WOMAN: Yes. That'd be great.
So I have to go to the signout menu, hit the "no sale" button, and type in my password just because this lady has a thing against quarters with moose on them. Let me tell you something, lady: no one else in the world cares whether your quarter is Canadian or not. It came out of my roll of quarters. It's fine.
3. Didn't I used to have another kid?
A woman just strolled out of the store without her son once. The poor kid stood in the front of the store screaming "Mommy!" I might be mistaken, but I think someone had to go chase after her to get her to come back. For HER OWN CHILD.
4. Gee, what's that sound?
Another one in the category of negligent parents: A woman just stands by as her son flips the handle on the emergency exit door, which results in a loud, piercing, and - most importantly - annoying sound. Said woman calmly collects her children and strolls out without so much as an apology to the employees trying to figure out how to shut the alarm off or a reprimand to her precious child.
I amended my customer "hello-how-are-you" speech from "have a nice day" to "have a quiet day."
5. Scoot off a cliff, why dontcha?
Third in the Parental Negligence Series: a kid (around ten, maybe) will sometimes come into the store around 8 at night and ride his scooter along the front of the store (inside, not out) for no apparent reason, despite the fact that he's been kicked out multiple times for doing so.
6. Could I change four ridiculous hissy fits for one full-fledged tantrum?
A man asked me to make change in fives for his twenty. I politely told him that I can't make change (it's against store policy/rules) and that he could get change at the courtesy booth. He promptly exploded all over me.
ME: I'm sorry, sir, I can't make change.
MAN: What?! Don't give me that! I can see in your drawer; you've got a ton of fives right there!
ME: I'm not allowed to make change, sir. You can go over to the courtesy booth...
MAN: I don't WANT to go to the courtesy booth!
Well, I don't want to be having this conversation. Life just sucks for us both, I guess.
ME: I'm very sorry, sir.
MAN: They make change for me all the time at the [insert name of other town here] store!
Does this look like the [other town] store?! No. I don't care about what they do at the other store; I care about what my bosses tell me to do HERE. And they told me not to make change. I value my paycheck more than your constant need to have things your way.
ME: I'm sorry.
But not really.
7. Yummy!
A woman came through my line munching on dog biscuits. I was rather alarmed. I've been informed since, by someone I know, that dog treats are actually quite tasty. I suppose they'd be sort of like meat snacks (like jerky or whatever), but I'm a vegetarian - what do I know?
I thought I had more stories than this. Poo.
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