Spoiler Alert!

I am about to commit television blasphemy: I was not happy with the season premiere of Bones.

I waited for it all summer (after a season finale whose plot mainly consisted of "Booth - Zach - Gormagon - WTF?!") and I had high expectations for the season premiere - even though, statistically, most of the shows I watch tend to be weakest in their fourth seasons -Buffy, Gilmore Girls (until the seventh season, which was far worse), and so on. Nevertheless, I thought Bones might be able to somehow sidestep the mud puddle that is a show's fourth season.

If the season premiere is any indication, then the answer is: not so much.

I was excited about the on-location filming in England, but it ended up feeling gimmicky. The Angela-Hodgins breakup (I told you right in the title of this entry, spoiler alert! Don't whine because you didn't pay attention to the warning!) was waaaayyyy too rushed. They're like, "I love you." "No, I love you." "Awww, kisses!!!!" "Wait, you don't trust me." "Well, I don't trust you either." "Let's break up." "I don't want to..." "Me neither. "...but okay." Seriously? SERIOUSLY?! They've gone through two seasons of relationship hurdles and all of a sudden they break up in a diner? In thirty seconds?! Come on, now. If you're having second thoughts about getting married, then DON'T GET MARRIED YET. You don't just break up with your longtime partner over one problem. Go to therapy, for crying out loud. Dr. Sweets - remember him - is a shrink with two doctorates. GET SOME FREE THERAPY FOR PETE'S SAKE.

Everything felt rather off. No one seemed upset about Zach anymore, which I found really weird. I mean, the guy went to Iraq for a couple months and no one could stop talking about it until he returned. The guy kills another human being, betrays the team, is tried for murder, and is sentenced to rot away in a mental institution for the rest of his life, and no one seems to care (apart from Brennan's brief mention of it at the beginning, which I totally didn't buy, by the way...talk about airing the dirty laundry in front of company. It felt like what it was: a quick recap for the audience about the events of last season. Seriously, splurge for a "Previously on Bones" montage. Don't bother with this contrived "let's just put the recap right into the script!" crap.)

Also, the first hour ended abruptly...or did it even end? We never found out who really committed the crime (was it the butler in the sitting room with the fireplace poker?). Not only that, but we never saw anyone all that invested in solving it. It's been established that Booth hates "privileged people" getting away with things. Wouldn't he be out there trying to prove the duke's guilt if he had even the slightest suspicion of his (the duke's) guilt?

And also, the lord was doing his sister? Gross. And yet, no one seemed all that upset about it - even the lord (and his girlfriend's) father, the duke. Are we supposed to believe that the British are just okay with incest for the most part ("Cheerio, this tea is rather cold, and that bloke shags his sister. Two distasteful things in one day. Oh, well.")?

Onto things I didn't hate quite so much: I could buy Cam sleeping with Grayson, and I could buy her feeling guilty about it. I didn't quite like the way things actually unfolded, but I can't put my finger on what it was I didn't like.

There were a few highlights of the episode, though. I liked Pritch (I'd seen the actress in something else - Bride and Prejudice, and it was nice to see her playing someone who wasn't a biznatch), and I wouldn't mind seeing more of her, although not as a love interest for Booth (not just because I love Booth/Brennan, but because I didn't think that he and Pritch had much romantic chemistry. Ian and Brennan had more, and I hated the thought of them together. I didn't like Ian all that much.). I thought the bells ringing when Hodgins and Angela kissed was cute and a nice touch. And pretty much everything with Sweets was good. (I'm one of the few who actually like him, I guess.) I was sad to see Clark - the new addition to the team - go, although I fully understand his reasons. There is far too much drama at the Jeffersonian. It's only a wonder that a smart man like him didn't figure it out way earlier - like last season, when he was there for Max's murder trial. He didn't pick up on the drama then?

All in all, though, it was a lackluster season premiere that hopefully is not an indication of the rest of the season's strength. I think that if the show doesn't get better, I'll have to place it's "jump the shark" moment at last season when they shot Booth. Everything went downhill after that.

But I'll be watching again next week. Hopefully I won't be disappointed again.