Oomis Gloomis

I am one of those strange people that occasionally relishes being sick.

I am a very busy person but deep down inside I am very lazy, and being sick offers one the rare opportunity of being totally sedentary. Not only do other people accept this, they encourage it. So you can understand my point of view.

I have some fond memories of being sick. In ninth grade when I got colds, I'd snuggle under the covers and watch Law and Order: SVU on DVD while eating tomato soup (with cheese, sour cream, and bacon bits - which, if you buy the right kind, are actually 100% vegetarian) and drinking orange juice. When I went to Florida in May and my stomach decided to stage a full-on rebellion and I almost had to get an IV, I still got to watch Shanghai Nights in a hotel bed, all nice and comfortable (except for the yacking-into-a-wastebasket portions of the day). And in between yackings, I felt tired but otherwise okay.

You might be wondering why I am boring and disgusting you with a history of my prior illnesses. I'll tell you why: because I'm sick right now and it is NOT FUN. At all.

After three days of hacking cough and intense throat pain and two nights of night sweats and weird, half-awake dreams, I schlepped over to the campus health center, expecting (almost hoping) to be diagnosed with some kind of ominous-sounding ailment. (I say "hoping" because having some kind of sinister disease at least makes your misery justified in a sense, whereas having a boring old cold is just a cruel, anti-climactic cop-out.) Thirty minutes, 20 questions, and a throat swab later, I was told that - basically - I have a cold.

I reject this diagnosis.

To the health center's credit, the nurse was really nice, and she didn't at all imply that I was a wimp for making such a fuss over a cold; in fact I think she genuinely realized how miserable I was (and am). But still, it was disappointing. In the throes of a night-sweat-induced semi-hallucination, I had diagnosed myself with bronchitis coupled with a sinus infection. And to be told that I didn't even have a lousy case of strep was just plain disheartening.

What I do have, however, is another sleepless night of chills and sweats to look forward to, followed by another day in which I will not leave my bed. This is actually getting boring.

I KNOW I have work to do. It's just a question of mustering up the motivation to make myself DO it. I have to select all my classes for next term by 4 pm tomorrow...I haven't even looked at the course catalog. I have only the vaguest of ideas of what I'd like to take. I could have taken care of all that today and crossed it off the ever-growing list of Things I Have To Do, but noooo. Similarly, I have not started the English paper I have due on Monday, have not sent my history prof a more detailed version of my term paper outline, have not sent my religion notes to the classmate who asked me for them two days ago, have not been keeping up with my "readings journal" for history, and have not finished reading Huck Finn for English. On the bright side, however, I DID finish (finally!!!) Anne of Windy Poplars, my least favorite of the Anne of Green Gables books, so I can move on to Anne's House of Dreams, which is one of what I believe to be the better ones. (My favorites, though, are the original Anne of Green Gables and Anne of the Island. Anne of Avonlea didn't seem to me to have much of a plot to it. I know all the Anne books are pretty much just vignettes, but that's my opinion and I'm sticking to it.)

And now I am off to read some Anne's House of Dreams. Before I do, though, I want to thank my friends - on the off-chance that they are reading this - for all their help over the past couple days, bringing me food (thanks, David!), running errands for me (thanks, Mich!), surprising me with OJ and cough drops (thanks, Michelle!), and just checking up on me and offering to help me out with anything I need. You guys are the greatest!